Cold

I feel like this day and week is never ending. I am exhausted and it is only Wednesday. I am cold, and no matter how many layers I have on, how thick my socks are, or how warm my ugg boots should be, my feet are freezing. Lately my days have just been running together, everyday the same, work and then work out and then more work, repeat repeat repeat. The snow is getting to me. It won't stop. It just keeps coming and piling up and making me feel like winter is never going to end. I broke down and went tanning so I could pretend as I was laying in the electric beach, I was really somewhere warm, with pretty drinks accompanied by cute umbrellas, crystal blue water and hot sand. But then my 8 minutes were up and the layers of clothing, scarf, mittens and boots went back on and I sulked out to my cold car and drove home.

I am beginning to wonder how I survived living in the midwest this long, I mean I REALLY do not like the cold. You might even say I hate it?? But I stayed to finish school, and now I am staying to finish my apartment lease and wait for my wonderful boyfriend to find out where he will go to medical school. I think a lot of my hate towards this winter is that I am not in school. I think looking back, school really filled up a lot of my time, and even when I wasn't at school I was doing something school related, or working, which kept me busy. Now its just work, and I don't ever have work to do at home and so I can just sit and think about all of the things I would rather be doing but can't because it's snowing, or icy, or too cold to even want to go outside. Things like running outside, walking places instead of driving, grilling, laying out in the real sun, boating, swimming, wearing flip flops and shorts and dresses, sitting on the patio watching all of the other students walking by our apartment, watching the sun set, summer cocktails, eating dinner outside, leaving the windows open at night.

But I'm snuggled up in my bed, layers on, fuzzy socks trying to keep my icicles, i mean toes warm, and my space heater blaring, and I am just counting down the days until summer arrives.